Ugh. I need to do something with myself. I feel like I am falling apart. Since having Porgie, my body has changed in many many ways. Most of them are not good.
Let's start with the extra weight. I feel like a blimp - enormous and round. My waist is gigantic. I feel like I have a tire wrapped around my midsection. Also, I have gained weight in my legs. I even got a few stretchmarks on my thighs (after Porgie was born, not during my pregnancy). It is really gross.
Let's move on to my boobs. When I was pregnant, my breasts never really grew. I was able to wear my pre-pregnancy bras for the entire nine months. However, once I got a good milk supply established, my breasts looked awesome. They were notably bigger. However, when I stopped pumping, they quickly deflated. Now they just look saggy. I have old lady boobs.
Let's move on to my skin. I don't know if it has something to do with our house or the New Jersey weather, but my skin is super dry. My knuckles have even begun to crack and bleed. If I don't lather my body with lotion everyday, my skin will itch all day long. It is very annoying.
Let's move on to my hair. Shortly after giving birth, all of my hair fell out. Well, maybe not all of it, but it definitely thinned out. My hair used to be thick and full. Now it is flat and thin. It probably doesn't help that I only shower two or three times per week. Porgie screams the entire time I am in the shower, so I avoid bathing like the plague. I would take a shower while she is napping, but I am too afraid of accidentally waking her up.
Let's move on to my clothing. After I stopped pumping, my ass became huge - HUGE!!! I only have three outfits that I can comfortable wear. So, I just don't even get dressed some days. I schlep around my house in pajamas ALL DAY. I am turning into the world's biggest loser. I am totally lame.
Let's move on to my teeth. I really need to go to the dentist. I know I have some cavities, but I just don't feel like wasting a Saturday at the dentist's office. And I don't want to pay their insanely expensive prices. Maybe I'll just let my teeth fall out! Then, my mouth can match the rest of my homely appearance.
6 comments:
I need to go see the dentist as well as I have a chip on one side of my tooth from when I was pregnant with Aiden and another chip from when I was pregnant with Caileigh. Last thing I feel like doing although, an hour alone might be a treat! The whole pregnancy body is a weird experience. After Aiden I got back to pre-pregnancy pretty quick. This time I still have 15 pounds to go and for some reason seemed to gain 5 more in the last 2 weeks?? Too much chocoalte? Not enough exercise? Who knows. My hair hasnt started to fall out yet but I am sure it will start soon. I just feel disgusting because my hair is short (not a style I like) and the colour seems brassy and my eyes seem to have more wrinkles all of a sudden and I have no clothes to wear and dont want to buy any until I now what size I will be. Ah the joys!!
ahhhh! ok, self deprecation (my own included) is running rampant across the web. What is going on with us women?
After giving birth to Mikaela, I, too, suffered from all the unfortunate afflictions you mentioned. Hell, I am still bald on the upper left part of head (yah, I have changed my hairdo in order to compensate). Oh and you already know all about my weight issue woes. ;)
This really gets me thinking. How in the hell do those Hollywood bitches (i.e. Angelina Jolie) do it? How in the f*** are they able to get pregnant (by accident, usually), have their babies, get into shape like three seconds after giving birth, and walk away completely unscathed - without the slightest boob deflation, stretch mark or hair attenuation to mention? I have figured it out: plastic surgery.
You and I exist in the REAL world. We are mommies (battle scars and all).
I don’t have all the answers, but what I can tell you is that you are beautiful – notwithstanding the fact that this is coming from out in the blogosphere, I am still a legitimate friend and my feelings are, nonetheless, sincere.
Here to hoping we will soon be able to celebrate “mommy-hood” and banish our disparaging self-images.
Hugs,
Tiffany
HA! It can't be that bad! You are too funny.
But I know how you feel. Sometimes I'll look at myself at 2 PM and be like: why is my baby washed and dressed and cute and I am still in my nightclothes from TWO nights ago? I smell funny--is that spitup in MY HAIR?
Anyway, I bet you 100 dollars my stretchmarks are grosser than yours--mine are 3D!
Maybe a humidifier for your skin? That's what I'm trying.
I sympathize, but I bet you are a crazy exaggerator!
Ashley,
I totally understand why you don't want to buy clothes until you lose the pregnancy weight. Why waste the money?
Tiffany,
Most days, I accept my fat ass, stretchmarks and all. I don't know what is wrong with me lately. I've been a little depressed. I blame it on the weather. I was stuck in the house for 4 days (I usually go out everyday). Luckily, I am feeling better. I promise to stop whining.
Eva,
Maybe I exaggerated a little. It just feels like I really let myself go since Porgie was born. I think that if I start taking more pride in my appearance, I will feel better about myself.
So, even though I said I wasn't going to, I am going to buy some clothes that actually fit me. I am sick of putting on pants that don't fit and bras that are suddenly too big. I am going to get my hair dyed too. My roots are so long.
Definitely, try to do something nice for yourself. It sounds like you are in a funk and I think it is partly because of the weather. I know I have been down lately and I am just trying to ride it out. Sigh.
I will say that I do take a shower and put on a minimum of makeup every day. every day! I have to, or I do not feel good about myself. The clothes thng is hard, because I agree it is hard to pay money for clothes when you are between sizes. Hang in there.
Also, get yourself to the dentist! Dental health is so important when you are pregnant, then go into nursing. It can really take a toll on your teeth.
Why oh why could I have not discovered your blog sooner? Girl I am in the same boat and Ella and Porgie sound like twins. She is 2 and then some now, and taking showers is still super difficult for me, she whines and yells and sometimes screams at the top of her little lungs. I lost a bunch of hair on my head too after Ella and it somehow landed on my face and body and has decided to take root and sprout there. Eww...disgusting.
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