When Porgie settled down to take her first nap this morning, I started working on a wonderful post for you. It was witty and smart, with lots of adorable baby pictures. But you will never see that post. After working on it for about 45 minutes, I accidentally deleted it. I am a jackass.
I seem to be doing a lot of stupid things lately. So, I'll share some of my stupidity with you.
1. After writing a new blog post, I proofread my writing three times before I click the publish button. However, I always see a mistake as soon as I view my blog. Then I have to go back and edit the post again. If you see a typo, just know that I proofread 268 times, but I just didn't see that stupid ass mistake. Sorry.
2. The other night I was making spaghetti. Keep in mind that I never cook. When the pasta was ready (but still boiling in water), I asked John how I should scoop out the noodles. He looked at me like I had three heads and told me to go get the strainer. So that is what that bowl with holes in it is for. WOW, I am losing my freaking mind!
3. This one happened awhile ago, but it is so ridiculous that I have to share it with you. John and I were at our insurance agent's office. Somehow, we started talking about college. I was telling our agent about an intersession class I had taken. Suddenly, John busted out laughing. Apparently, instead of calling it an intersession class, I called it an intercourse class. What the hell is wrong with me?
4. The other night, I was getting ready to go to bed. I turned out all of the lights and headed toward the bedroom. I thought I was walking into my room, but instead I slammed right into the door. That one really hurt.
5. This one really shows my stupidity. Last night Porgie slept through the night again. I woke up at 5:50 and started worrying about her. I could not go back to sleep until I checked on her. So, I tiptoed into her room and peered into the crib. She was sleeping peacefully. I turned around to leave and ran into her book stand. I woke her up.
When I was pregnant with Porgie, I think she absorbed all of my brain cells. She keeps getting smarter and smarter, while I keep getting dumber and dumber.
Okay, maybe my first post wasn't witty or smart, but it definitely contained cute baby pictures.
7 comments:
LOL!!!! ok, let me just tell you that i ALWAYS find typos and punctuation errors when i post. t, too, go back and edit like 400 times. that is just how it goes, i suppose. i get so wrapped up in what i am writing that i totally abandon my five years of college and go straight into remedial english.
and just for the record this post was quite cute and witty. ;)
see? i already found a typo in my comment. LOL!!!
I am laughing hysterically here!! I can relate to so many of those!!
Sooo funny I laughed out loud and woke my OWN baby!
I'm way stupider now, too. I have forgotten how to speak Spanish entirely and I used to teach it at the university. My friend told our Mexican waiter the other week that I know Spanish, and I ended up somehow conveying to him that I was in a coma after Baby was born and also, possibly, I'm not really sure, that I am Irish.
Still sleeping through the night??? Wow! Mine too. Isn't it sooo confusing to wake up to silence and not be tired?
where is it that those damn errors hide when we're proofreading, anyway? i mean, i edit for a living, or used to...but my own blog? nope, gotta torture the people who have me bloglined by reposting time and again...
you're funny. great post.
The "running joke" from my husband is that I've gone from a college education to the 1st grade.
Hey, at least I get to color outside the lines!
I needed this post today. I just discovered your blog and I clicked archives and this is the first post that popped up. Thanks for the laugh, hilarious.
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