Now for a little more history regarding my offspring.
About 3 weeks after Porgie came home from the hospital, she refused to sleep. My newborn would stay awake all day and half of the night. The child seemed to never sleep. It was scary.
I tried everything I could think of to get her to sleep. Sometimes I would drive her around in the car, sometimes I would put her in the swing, sometimes I would lay her on my chest, sometimes I would lay her in the bassinet, and on and on and on.
The kid would not sleep for more than twenty minutes during each of her naps. And she cried a lot. A LOT. I kept asking people for help, but they acted like I was crazy. “What? Your newborn doesn’t sleep? Newborns sleep up to 16 hours per day.” WHATEVER, my baby did not sleep.
After a month of horrible sleeping patterns, I could finally get Porgie to sleep on my chest for about an hour, three times a day. This was very inconvenient because I couldn’t move. I lay perfectly still while she slept. Even with this weird napping situation, I was thrilled about her actually sleeping.
However, her night sleeping continued to be a nightmare. She was waking me every hour or two. At this time, she was sleeping in a bassinet next to my bed. One sleepless night, I decided to put her in bed with me. This was out of sheer desperation to get some sleep. Something remarkable happened. Porgie went to sleep and stayed asleep for 3 or 4 hours. Needless to say, we started co sleeping.
At first, co sleeping was a like a miracle. She was only waking me 2 or 3 times per night. This was a dream compared to waking me 6 or 7 times per night. My family warned me that I was spoiling her, and that I would never be able to get her into her crib. I didn’t care. I was finally getting some sleep and it felt good.
Overtime, I expected that Porgie would wake me up even less. Unfortunately, this never happened. For the next 7 months, she woke me up 3 times a night. When my husband finally intervened last week, I was so thankful. However, I think I just made a huge mistake. I am truly the biggest idiot in the world.
Porgie woke up at 3am screaming. I made her a 4-ounce bottle, which she gulped down. I left the room and she started screaming again. After a few minutes, I made another 2-ounce bottle and when in to feed her. Once again, she gulped down the formula and continued screaming. I left the room and listened to her cry off and on for about an hour. During this time, John got up and left for work.
Being alone in the house with no support, I couldn’t take the crying. So, I went back in to comfort her. I didn’t want to take her out of the crib, but she was so upset that I had to. I sat in the rocking chair and rocked her for about 20 minutes. She calmed down, but she was wide wake. I didn’t know what to do with her, so I put her back in the crib. She cried for another 1 hour.
I was at my breaking point. I couldn’t take anymore crying. At 5:30, I brought her into bed with me, where she quickly fell asleep. I also quickly went to sleep. When I woke up, I hated myself for taking her out of the crib. I knew John was going to be mad, so I decided that I wasn’t even going to tell him. Maybe it was just a one time thing. Next time, she will go back to sleep on her own in the crib.
This morning at 10:30, I tried to put Porgie down for a nap in her crib. She cried and cried and cried. She cried for 30 minutes, until I got her out of the crib. Now I know that I really messed up. What have I done? How do I fix this?
4 comments:
Boy I feel for you! Not getting sleep is the absolute worst thing in the world when you're a mom. Do you think she's teething? Just wondering if that is what some of this is about.
I guess my suggestion would be to go in after a couple minutes and pat/rub her back or butt for a minute, then leave. Wait for 5 minutes before you go back in again and do the same thing. Just keep doing that, gradually increasing the time between pats. Don't talk to her because that may just rile her up.
My son sometimes gets MORE upset when I go in there instead of just letting him fuss for a little bit. You just have to experiment with different techniques until you find something that works.
I know it probably makes you crazy, but you're doing the best you can!!
Dooneybug,
I don't think she is teething, but who knows? She hasn't been drooling excessively or anything. Like you, I also find that she gets more upset when I go in to check on her. But I have to - it is so heartbreaking to hear her cry. Thanks you for reading and for the advice. - christy
Oh, that sucks. I know how excited you were about her sleeping well in the crib. Babies are confusing. Right when you think you have something down they change it up. The nice thing about that is that this will change again soon, and no "mistake" will be forever.
Right now mine is giving me hell about sleeping, too. Argh. I'm holding her back to sleep RIGHT NOW for the THIRD TIME for her afternoon nap (typing one-handed).
I know that cosleeping can be annoying and sweet at the same time I (we do it sometimes). I don't blame babies for preferring it or you for not.
So with Porgie--is it time for one of the sleep regressions?
http://moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/2006/02/qa_what_are_sle.html
What about food--anything new?
Maybe she is over the novelty of crib sleeping?
Sometimes there is no reason. I don't really know what to tell you. Why does your husband's opinion matter so much? He's not the one up with the baby for the most part, right? If you have to hold her to sleep sometimes, so be it. But I know how annoying it is when you want to get shit done, or just sit around a bit.
I'm just babbling.
I have no advice since I am having the same problem. I'm sure things will improve, or at least change, soon. Our baby was up past midnight the other night for no reason and last night slept at 8 like usual. No idea why. Hard to make babies do things. Not your fault.
Good luck and keep us posted.
Eva,
I read Moxie's blog all the time. She is great. The next sleep regression is suppose to be at 9 months - Porgie will be 8 months next week. I don't know why I worry about what John thinks. I guess I just want everyone to be happy.
Your daughter is probably having sleeping problems due to teething and developmental milestones. Around 5 months, Porgie got 2 teeth, became a pro at rolling, and learned to sit up unassisted. Around that time, she also had lots of restless nights. What the hell am I talking about? Porgie was always restless.
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