Since discovering that I was pregnant, I have effectively managed to remain calm and collected about my situation. I try to focus on the positives. But occasionally, I start to panic. What the fuck am I doing? How the hell am I going to care for two babies? What if Izzy and I have breastfeeding issues? Is Porgie going to be jealous of her little brother? Will Izzy have colick? Will Porgie be going through the terrible twos? AHHHH!
I know that the first three months after Izzy's birth will be traumatic and awful - for everyone involved. I am expecting this, but I am also hopeful that this time around will be much easier. I have experience on my side, right? And maybe Porgie will be my little helper. And hopefully John will stop working tons of overtime, so he can help out with the babies too. If we work together, I think we will be okay.
Despite all of my fears, I am thrilled about having little Izzy in our lives. Maybe its just my happpy pregnancy hormones talking, but I have a feeling that Izzy is going to be a laid-back and content baby. And I am keeping my fingers crossed that he'll be a good sleeper. That is the thing I am most worried about. If Izzy sleeps good, I think we can handle anything else he throws our way.