Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Why yes, I am a retarded asshole

Remember that time I gave myself a third degree burn while making rice? Good times. Or the time I fell in the ocean while I was holding Porgie? Good times. Well I have a new one for you. I nearly broke my damn finger while doing laundry yesterday.

It all started out innocently enough. I carried a load of laundry down to the basement and tossed it on the floor in front of the washing machine. I flipped the lid open and reached down to grab the dirty clothes. But before I could pick up any of the clothes, the lid slammed back down onto my poor little pinky finger. It hurt like a motherfucker. I stood there, waving my gimpy finger around, and cursing like a sailor. Just thinking about it makes me cringe. So painful.

After I calmed down, I noticed that my finger was swollen and purple. Here is some photographic evidence...
I can still bend my finger, so I guess it is not broken. But holy cow, DO NOT TOUCH MY FINGER, because it really hurts.

Obviously, doing the laundry is entirely way too dangerous for me. Therefore, I think my husband should assume responsibility of this household chore. The end.

35 comments:

pisceshanna said...

hahah "the Hazards of being a mom" I just rolled my ankle while hiking with my toddler on my back. Last summer I sprained my wrist picking up too many things at once. My doc said that moms get more hand injuries than people realize. She had to wear a splint on her finger because her son kicked it while she was tying his shoe! AHHHH DANGER wILL ROBINSON!

Jeninacide said...

I hate it when I hurt myself really stupidly. I have bruises all over my legs from ramming into things- I simply have no TIME to pay attention to where I am going, I guess.

moo said...

lmao that husband will have to do laundry from now on ... because it is TOO HAZARDOUS to your health!

Midwest Mommy said...

Oh my god lord! That looks painful!

Heather @ A Boy, A Girl, A Pug said...

Ouch Mama!

I totally agree. Laundry is hazardous to your health. The husband should now do all the laundry.

Shoot, you could get hurt doing other household chores too. Husband needs to do them all.

I mean really, what if you injure yourself further. You wouldn't be able to take care of the kids!

It's for the kids really:)

iMommy said...

I completely agree. In fact, I will be mounting a campaign for my husband to do all the laundry as well. Your injury is not in vain, no! You serve as a warning to all who must do laundry, and I will not take it lightly!

::teehee::

amanda said...

once again i love your photographic evidence :) i mean it looks gross and all, but i like the proof.

and clearly the husband should assume all laundry duty until further notice.

stay away from the machine friend.

THopgood said...

OUCH! Fingers are the worst! I pinched 3 of my fingers in between the panels of our garage door once and I've never before or since known that kind of pain. Maybe you should start wearing protective garments while doing household chores...clearly they are a danger!

Amanda said...

Ouch!
You might have broken it, it looks really sore :(
Yep, your other half will HAVE to do all household jobs while your finger heals! Especially the dishes, ironing, washing, hoovering...!
l,
Amanda xx

Anth said...

Ouch! I hate when that kind of stuff happens. Your husband should DEFINITELY take over the laundry duties.

Melissa said...

ummm...have it checked if the swelling doesn't go down by tomorrow. I broke a metatarsal last year and didn't realize it for three days because "I could move my toes".

But dh should do the laundry, just in case...

Dana said...

I've done that before and it hurts, I know!! I'm sorry - hope your finger feels better soon!

Tabitha said...

Oh goodness ~ that does look painfull!!! I hope that it is all better soon! I agree ~ it is definitly too dangerous for you to carry on with the washing duties ha ha !!
love and hugs XXXXXXX

The Woman said...

ouch, that almost happened to me last week but i got my fingers out of the way.

Sugar and Ice said...

Ouch! That really does sound painful.

Awake said...

Laughing at your pictures!

Hope that heals soon.

Rachel said...

Oh christy. I wish I could send you some ice. That story stinks but very funny and only you could have told it so damn well. HUGS

Mama Kalila said...

Oh no!!! Why is it that it's always teh most embarrassing way possible that we hurt ourselves? Seriously...

Hope it gets better soon...

Eva said...

You sure know how to make things exciting!

Jennifer said...

OUCH!!! Yes, I think laundry should def be hubby's chore from here on out.

Can you claim workman's comp?

Carrie said...

Awww, poor baby. I'd kiss it and make it feel better if I wasnt 13 hours or so away.....

Danielle said...

OUCH! don't worry I am an asshole like that too! always getting injured.

Jenn said...

Ouch! It does look painful ,but at least you can bend it . Now you can get out of doing things by telling your husband it hurts your finger too bad !

Kristin H. said...

That makes my stomach turn just thinking about it. As a 90% SAHM, I encounter those incidents often. As a licensed massage therapist, I can't afford to hurt my hands or arms. Ever. When mama gets hurt, mama doesn't work. When mama doesn't work, mama doesn't get paid. Vicious circle.

dani said...

OUCH!!! that looks bad, christy; i hope it's getting better. laundry is far too dangerous for you to be attempting. john really should take that chore over for you, ha!!!
love,
dani

TEACHBROECK said...

God I love your posts! Sorry about the finger OUCH!

Z's Mom said...

OUCH! That really looks painful! I'm with you...I'm clumsy and I don't think I should have to do anything at my house....but I guess since I'm single....that would be a dumb idea! :)

Jessica said...

O U C H. I totally agree. I think your husband should take over laundry from now on. It is way to dangerous for you.

Insta-mom said...

Scrubbing toilets is definitely out of the question, too. You know, just broaden it to anything with a lid...trash cans, pots and pans...the fridge door swings, that's a hazard, isn't it? No grocery shopping, either.

Why can't moms get some worker's comp?

Nellie said...

Oh no. That sucks! It looks like it hurts SO bad! Is it better yet? How can you pick up kids? Change diapers? Feed babies? With one hand!?

Kate said...

"It's an old laundry injury..." Definitely one I'll be using in the future...

Madge said...

yeah, housekeeping is a contact sport -- things they don't tell us.

sit down. have some cookies.

Keith said...

God bless you! I identify completely.... Yet, I have no one to assume my lioving functions, yet. So, with every bump, bruise, and scrapoe, I have to thank God I am alive, and move on.

I do like the pictures. Keep posting. You have a fun blog

Inzaburbs said...

Ouch. I really hope that calms down overnight and nothing is broken!
I know the feeling, my speciality however is burns. If there is something hot around (oven, iron, whatever...) it's guaranteed I will brand myself on it.

Becks said...

That really sucks the big one!! I always knew laundry was dangerous. Now I have proof and reason to not do it.