Because I am neurotic and slightly insane, I am always worrying about something. My latest fear is regarding fetal movement. I started feeling Porgie move at 18 weeks. I read that you usually feel fetal movements sooner with your second pregnancy. I am 17 weeks, and I haven't felt any movement. Okay, maybe I have felt a few faint sensations, but nothing that I can pinpoint as definite fetal movement. Of course, I am making myself insane with worry.
I know what you are going to say - "17 weeks is still really early," or "lots of people don't feel movement until 20 weeks," or "stop being insane and worrying for no damn reason."
Before I got pregnant with Porgie, I had this fantasy about pregnancy. I thought that I would waddle around, happily rubbing my belly. Instead, I fretted and worried the whole nine months - the longest nine months of my life. Honestly, I didn't really enjoy being pregnant.
When I got pregnant the second time, I thought that I would enjoy this pregnancy more. After all, I don't have the time to fret and worry about every little thing. Apparently I have more time than I thought, because I am already racked with fear. I think my fears in this pregnancy stem from the fact that I am already considered "high risk."
The thing that really sucks, is that my fears do not stop with delivery. They merely transform into new fears about SIDS, breastfeeding, developmental milestones, etc.
Being a mommy is tough.