For the past few months, I have been buying new clothes for the winter. I bought some jeans on clearance at Old Navy in the summer ($6 a pair!). They were a little snug, but I was confident that they would fit perfect by November. I have also been buying shirts whenever I see something cheap and cute.
I haven't really talked about it much, but after I got my braces in April, I made the decision to lose some weight. I was just feeling overwhelming unattractive with my fat rolls and my metal mouth. For the past 6 months, I have been a super star dieter. I have been eating less, exercising more, and eater smaller desserts. Yes, I still eat dessert every night. Without dessert, I would fall off the diet band wagon within a week.
After all of this hard work, I have almost reached my goal weight. I am nearly the same size I was in high school. GASP! Every time I step on the scale, I get a little giddy. And it motivates me even more to follow my diet. It has been a wonderful cycle, and frankly, it is not something I am used to. Usually my diets work in the opposite direction - I get discouraged because I am not losing weight, therefore I eat more and gain weight.
With the cooler weather approaching, I decided to try on all of my new clothes I have been buying. I was super excited about the prospect of not wearing a belt with my jeans. But things did not go exactly as I had planned. My clothes are too big. My pretty new clothes that I have been scrimping and saving to buy for months, don't even fucking fit me! The shirts are definitely do able, but my pants are just HUGE. I have mentioned before that I have no ass. This is a major problem when it comes to buying pants. If my jeans are even slightly big, the ass of my pants is all saggy and horrible looking. I need tight fitting jeans to make my ass look good.
I should have saved all my receipts, but I didn't. I keep having crazy, irrational thoughts about maybe gaining 5-10 pounds back. I know I am being annoying, "Woe is me, I lost too much weight." But for me, half the joy of losing weight is getting to buy new cute clothes that fit my new cute body. So, I am disappointed.