I am generally a pretty laid back parent. My kids are tearing up the house? Whatever. My kids are stripping their clothes off and running buck naked across the front lawn? Okay. My kids demand to walk in Target instead of riding in the cart? No problem. My weakness is whining. I can't stand it.
When the kids are whining, my entire body tenses up. It is completely and totally impossible to give the appearance of being calm. Sometimes I even catch myself balling up my fists repeatedly. I guess I developed this weird response to help release all the tension building up in my body. I probably have high blood pressure during these whining episodes too.
I also have a tendency to curse excessively when the kids are whining. I catch myself doing it all the time. For example, Izzy might be whining because he doesn't want to put on his shoes. After five minutes of watching him thrash around on the floor, I'll respond with a comment like this, "JUST GET THOSE SHOES AND PUT THEM ON YOUR DAMN FEET!" Horrible, I know. But it is like I have no control over my cursing when I am mad.
In college I did my student teaching in a kindergarten classroom. This teacher did not approve of raising your voice - even slightly. She was always the picture of calm. She would have a classroom full of LOUD and WHINY 5-year-olds, and she never lost her temper. I need to channel my inner kindergarten teacher (Have I mentioned that I hated teaching kindergarten? Those kids are annoying little creatures. And they are gross too. I have decided that 5-year-olds are only cute from a distance.).
This is something I really need to work on. I hate that I can't seem to remain calm at the exact moment when I need to be the most relaxed. I just want to be the best mother that I can be for my babies.