Friday, October 16, 2009

Short of Patience

I am generally a pretty laid back parent. My kids are tearing up the house? Whatever. My kids are stripping their clothes off and running buck naked across the front lawn? Okay. My kids demand to walk in Target instead of riding in the cart? No problem. My weakness is whining. I can't stand it.

When the kids are whining, my entire body tenses up. It is completely and totally impossible to give the appearance of being calm. Sometimes I even catch myself balling up my fists repeatedly. I guess I developed this weird response to help release all the tension building up in my body. I probably have high blood pressure during these whining episodes too.

I also have a tendency to curse excessively when the kids are whining. I catch myself doing it all the time. For example, Izzy might be whining because he doesn't want to put on his shoes. After five minutes of watching him thrash around on the floor, I'll respond with a comment like this, "JUST GET THOSE SHOES AND PUT THEM ON YOUR DAMN FEET!" Horrible, I know. But it is like I have no control over my cursing when I am mad.

In college I did my student teaching in a kindergarten classroom. This teacher did not approve of raising your voice - even slightly. She was always the picture of calm. She would have a classroom full of LOUD and WHINY 5-year-olds, and she never lost her temper. I need to channel my inner kindergarten teacher (Have I mentioned that I hated teaching kindergarten? Those kids are annoying little creatures. And they are gross too. I have decided that 5-year-olds are only cute from a distance.).

This is something I really need to work on. I hate that I can't seem to remain calm at the exact moment when I need to be the most relaxed. I just want to be the best mother that I can be for my babies.

8 comments:

Rachel said...

Christy-I do the same thing. I always say I can deal with anything except whining. But I have to say running naked across the lawn cracks me up and I hope as it gets colder-they dont freeze their little bums. You are not alone. I think we all do this.

Alicia W. said...

Christy - I'm right there with you. Everything you wrote sounded just like how I feel and I'm so ashamed. I feel even worse for you because at least I can get out and go to work. I had to call my Dr a few weeks ago to adjust my medication because I felt myself taking my anger out verbally on the kids and I don't want to be like my mother. Your not alone... I can promise you this. Hang in there sweetie.

Eva said...

I hate whining, too. Let me think about what I do...well I say "no fussing!" and that works some ("I not fussing mama, I happy!") but sometimes we just irritate each other a bunch and I have to walk away a bit. We've all said things we regret.

Mama Kalila said...

Completely understood. Whining gets to me too...

Just Jiff said...

oooh. I hate whining too! Bayley is small enough that I can put her in her crib and shut the door and walk off. lol. Don't know what I'll do when she's too big for that.

Chris said...

The kindergarten comment cracked me up! That's why I don't teach elementary school. Although I teach middle school.... sometimes they are like kindergartners with more hormones.

MommyGeek said...

Whining drives me nuts, but what gets my goat and makes me irrational and angry is when she smiles at me when I'm trying to discipline her. I've been known to lose my shit when that happens.

amanda said...

mommy business is hard.

plain and simple.

hard.