Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Being fat

Do you ever feel like you are always running behind? Always two steps behind everyone else? Always struggling to just stay on top on the simple things? Because that is exactly how I have been feeling lately. I just can't seem to get my act together.

I have a million things to do/decisions to make, yet no motivation to accomplish anything. I just want to go to sleep. For three or four months. I have been driving myself crazy again with self-doubt. I am paralyzed by indecision regarding several issues in my life. Everyone is looking to me for answers, and sadly, I have none.

To relieve my anxiety, I have been eating lots of food. Because that is how a fat girl deals with stress. Look! I made a pot pie! From scratch!Then, because the pot pie wasn't loaded with enough fat, I baked a chocolate cake! With chocolate fudge icing! From scratch!

Words to remember: "The risk of a wrong decision is preferable to the terror of indecision." ~ Maimonides


Jenny said...

Stay positive! I hope that you get motivated soon...we all get in our ruts and maybe once it gets warm out you will be more motivated to accomplish your to do list.
The pot pie and cake do look yummy!

Clare said...

yummmm!! i hope you are out of your funk soon. i actually tried to go running on sunday for the first time. it was tough!

Natalie said...

I didn't even get the invite!! Hang in there! I totally can relate. I actually did a post recently about buying all the stuff I need to start losing weight and getting in shape, and I still haven't touched any of it, either. It's hard to "be good" when you know you'll be missing out on pot pies and cakes!

MK said...

I'm sorry and hope things get better... but you just made me hungry! And I just ate lol.

antropologa said...

Can you mail me that food? Thanks.

Just Jiff said...

Are you pregnant? Hehe! Just kidding! I am with you on the eating, needs months of sleep, and too tired to keep up.

Just took my last final for the semester and I think I'll nap tonight before going to bed. :)

Where did you find your recipe for the pot pie? I'd like to try it!

amanda said...

oh man i love me some homemade pot pie. like super yum.

here's hoping the pot pie and the chocolate cake helped you feel better and make some decisions!

and if not? oh well - i am sure each bite was worth it :)

kristi said...

I am home after almost 16 years. I try to do a lot of grilled chicken and stuff like that for lunch!

Lainey-Paney said...

At least you're cooking.
...and "from scratch" no less.
Hubby wishes I'd do more of that!

Marni's Organized Mess said...

OMG!! I'm not the only one. I have been doing post after post in my head on food. It's because I eat under stress and I'm... STRESSED!!

misguidedmommy said...

you are such an asshole. Did you seriously just post a pic of a giant ass chocolate cake.

Man I want to kick you some times

Bon said...

pot pie. mmm.

i find when i'm exhausted and my world feels too small, i can't get up the energy to change anything either.

i don't know what to suggest, but i send you lots of love. and wish you were nearer, b/c i would eat a LOT of that cake for you.