Although it seems like many of my days are an endless parade of crying and poopy diapers, it isn't all bad. Some things have actually gotten easier the second time around. Let me explain...
When Porgie was little, I couldn't stand to hear her cry. My heart would race, and I would feel panicky. This is no longer the case. Porgie cries and Izzy cries and I am okay with this. I no longer judge the success of my parenting on the amounts of tears shed. As long as my babies are fed and cleaned and relatively happy, I am doing my job as a parent.
When Porgie was little, I was terrified of SIDS. I would wake up in a cold sweat, certain that Porgie was in danger. I remember sleeping with my hand on her chest some nights. However, SIDS is no longer at the forefront of my thoughts. When I put my babies to bed, I am confident that they are sleeping safe and sound.
When Porgie was little, I was terrified of letting my husband take her out by himself. She needed me. Obviously, I was the only person who knew how to take care of her - right? WRONG. Now I heartily encourage my husband to take my kids and leave the damn house already! They'll be fine without me.
In summary, I am not nearly as neurotic as I was the first time around. Its kind of nice to let go of these irrational, crazy fears.