Something I've been fretting over

If you've followed my blog from the beginning, you know that John and I make big babies. Porgie was 8 lb 4oz at 40 weeks. Izzy was 9lb 6oz at 39 weeks. With both pregnancies, I had pregnancy induced hypertension, but thankfully it never developed into anything more serious. Because of my high blood pressure, I had extra growth scans. According to my doctor, my babies were at a higher risk for growth restriction. Obviously my ginormous children never suffered any ill effects from my wacky blood pressure.

Before getting pregnant with this baby, I lost about 40 pounds. I started out at a fantastic weight. My blood pressure has been perfect the entire pregnancy. But oddly enough, my doctor seemed to think that my baby might be small. At my 24 week visit, my belly was measuring a week behind. At my 28 week visit, my belly was measuring a full 3 weeks behind. So, they scheduled me for another growth scan.

At first, I didn't really think much of it. I mentioned it to a few good friends, but I tried not to make the information into a big deal. But everyone I encountered seemed to mention that my stomach was "SO TINY!!!" I guess people thought I'd appreciate their comments on my small size, but instead they just made me nervous. Honestly, I haven't felt "tiny" in a long time. At this point, I feel large and cumbersome (like all third trimester mommies). Also, the baby gives me nice big kicks, which also don't feel like they are being made by a tiny creature. But regardless, all of these outside comments on the size of my belly slowly crept into my neurotic brain. I often found myself lying awake at night thinking about it.

My growth scan was this afternoon, and honestly, I was more than a little scared. But all that worrying was for NOTHING, because my baby is in the 54th percentile for growth. Totally and completely normal. Not too big, not too small, but just right. I am thinking that instead of having another large baby, I am going to have a nice average-sized bundle of joy. And I am completely fine with that.

Now maybe I can get a little sleep.

P.S. The ultrasound was painful. PAINFUL. Apparently the baby's head was at a weird angle, so the tech decided to apply a ton of pressure to her little wand. I am fairly certain that she fucked up some of my ligaments or something, because since leaving the office, every time the baby moves my lower abdomen hurts. And for all my pain and suffering, I received two completely vague and unrecognizable photos. Awesome.

Baby!

I went to visit my friend C and her new baby. OH MY GOD, newborn babies are so small! He was just the tiniest, cutest little thing in the whole world. His skin was so soft! And his feet were so teeny! I just wanted to eat him up. I held him for almost an entire hour, and honestly, I could have cuddled him for much longer. Then I came home to my HUGE children. I swear Porgie grew 3 inches while I was visiting with the new little one. My daughter has been really into babies lately, so she was a little disappointed that she didn't get to visit the baby too. I hope this love of babies continues after our baby arrives in August, because I could use the help!

I wanted to bake something delicious for C and her husband. You see, I often have really good intentions, but my plans rarely ever work out. I wanted to make this yummy strawberry pie that I have been making every week since we went strawberry picking nearly a month ago. I currently have a half eaten strawberry pie in my fridge, but I thought I had another pie pan stored away somewhere. I searched high and low, but the pie pan was nowhere to be found. Since the pie was out, I found a recipe for strawberry shortcake cookies. I procrastinated and ended up making them right before Porgie's dance class, and we were nearly late for class as a result. To top everything off, the cookies came out flat and mushy. I seem to be completely unable to make cookies lately. Every recipe (even my tried and true recipes), turn out too hard or too soft or too flat. UGH. So, the new mother did not receive a delicious treat from me. However I did crochet her baby a beautiful afghan, so I think she'll forgive me.

My nightgown dress

I have fretted over it for several days, but I have officially decided that it is a dress.

Is it okay to wear a nightgown in public?

I was at Babies R Us this morning looking for some new nursing bras. While browsing around, I found this really cute dress...Except the the dress I bought is even cuter, because it is in a coral color. After I got home, I realized that the tag said it was a nightgown. But it doesn't look like a nightgown to me. I honestly and sincerely thought it looked like a maternity dress. So what do you think? If I wear it around town, will people constantly be thinking, Why is that woman wearing a nightgown to the grocery store?

In this post, I act like my life is really hard. Woe is me.

I've had this insane roller coaster of emotion weekend. I wrote this overly dramatic post about my health insurance on Friday, but then I decided not to post it. Long story short, my husband's company is switching insurance companies 2 weeks before my due date. When I realized that my doctor and hospital might not be covered by the new company, I had an emotional breakdown. I fought back tears all evening.

The next morning I found out that my good friend C had her baby! I am so excited for her, but it really drove home the fact that I only have 2 months left until I deliver this baby. On a certain level, I feel ready. I mean, I already have 2 crazy little monkeys to care for. How much harder could 3 kids really be? But on the other hands, I feel completely overwhelmed by the concept. I haven't cared for a baby in years.

Saturday night we watched my friend C's daughter. It was our first official sleepover. The kids were beyond excited. They went to bed a little late (as I expected), but they were actually really good. However, Porgie is just getting over a cold and she is still coughing at night. I guess my paranoia that Porgie would wake her little friend got the best of me, because I woke up at every little cough and clearing of the throat. I got up exhausted.

Sunday was Father's day, and my husband seemed to be in a bad mood. Couple that with the fact that I was feeling all hormonal about nothing, and you have a recipe for a bad day. I tried to keep it together for John, but I felt like I was on the verge of tears for most of the day.

Today I plan on sticking close to home and getting some stuff done on my "to-do list." I think that might make me feel a little better. I need to kick this funky feeling in the ass.

Busy little bee

I have been in overdrive lately. It is not nesting per se, but just a lot of crap I have been putting off for months. Everything is catching up with me, and I really need to start making some progress before the new baby arrives. I have complied a list of chores for myself and for John. The amount of stuff we need to do is overwhelming.

Tuesday I got a wild hair up my ass and decided that I was going to get shit done. And in true Christy fashion, I completely overdid it. I ran myself to the point of exhaustion. I was on my feet all day. By 4:00pm, while making dinner, I got dizzy. So dizzy that I thought I was going to pass out. My body was screaming for rest. After laying down for about 30 minutes, I felt much better. Then John came home from work and took the kids to the library while I lounged on the couch eating chocolate covered raisins. WHAT? Developing babies needs chocolate. It is a scientific fact!

Yesterday was another busy day, but I made sure to sit down occasionally. It is amazing how a little thing like taking 30 minutes to sit on the couch, can completely change how I feel. Today I have been working on "organizing" Porgie and Izzy's closet. I use the term "organize" loosely, because really I have just been stacking crap on the top shelf. But that is better than having all of the crap (blankets, Halloween costumes, stuffed animals, etc.) stacked on top of the dressers. I am truly amazed by how much stuff we have crammed into this tiny house. I give bags of stuff to the Goodwill monthly, but I still can't seem to stay on top of it.

Tomorrow I have to go pick out a Father's Day present for John, so it should be an easy morning. But this weekend? So much crap to do!

The transition

We have a small house. A very small house. I would love to move, but unfortunately we would never be able to make a profit off of this house in the current market. More specifically, we would have to take a loss. Needless to say, we aren't moving any time soon. With baby number three on the way, we decided to buy bunk beds for Porgie and Izzy. The big kids will share a room (for now) and the new baby will get his/her own room. This plan seems fine and dandy, except for the fact that my children have never shared a room in their lives.

Our brand spanking new bunk beds were delivered on Saturday. You have no idea how much my children LOVE their new beds. Porgie is on the top bunk and Izzy is on the bottom. They spent most of the weekend climbing all over their awesome new beds. In fact, they love their new beds and sleeping arrangement so much, that it is virtually impossible for them to fall asleep at night. There is lots of screaming, laughing, and talking going on. But unfortunately, there is very little sleeping.

To my horror, my children are going to sleep extremely late (like around 10pm). And then they are waking up at the butt crack of dawn (around 6:30 am). I am a creature who likes routine, and this deviation in our routine is KILLING me. It is extra bad, because these last few months before the new baby arrives are my final chance for any decent amount of sleep. And my 3 year old and 5 year old are ruining it! It is not fair!

Here is a stock photo of our fabulous new furniture. It cost a pretty penny, but we all love it...

My first cherry pie

I bought a bag of cherries for my son last week. Cherries are EXPENSIVE, so I was reluctant to purchase them. But Izzy insisted that he would eat them, so I relented. As expected, after a week in our fridge, he had only eaten a handful of cherries. My suzie homemaker attitude kicked in, and I decided to make a cherry pie...This was my first attempt at cherry pie, and it turned out perfect. We sliced it up, and placed a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top. DELICIOUS!

FIVE!

We had Porgie's 5th birthday party last weekend. She is really into dinosaurs right now, so we had fish cupcakes for the carnivores and leaf cupcakes for the herbivores. Look at my awesome baking skills...


Now that everyone has seen my fabulous cupcakes, we can move on to the actual party. We started out in the backyard, digging for dinosaur bones in the sandbox. It was a little overcrowded, but the kids didn't seem to mind...

Then we played "pin the head on the dinosaur skeleton," which no-one seemed to care about. Porgie liked it though...

Next we had to "hatch" dinosaur eggs. Here is a pictures of my son "hatching" his egg. I put candy inside the balloons, so the kids LOVED this activity...


Then it was lunchtime, so we went inside for some yummy pizza and cake...
And last, but certainly not least, Porgie opened her presents...


And a good time was had by all.

Details

For the past year, John and I have debated whether or not to have more children. Although I acted indifferent about the whole subject, I really REALLY wanted another baby. But I tend to worry about stupid things, like the size of our dinning room table and sleeping arrangements. I somehow turn all of these goofy little issues into BIG HUGE problems, which prevent me from taking action and making decisions. I am insane.

After talking about it for months, John and I started trying for baby # 3 in late October. I found out I was pregnant in December (right before our trip to Kentucky). I went to the OB and had every thing confirmed mid-January. Then the first trimester woes really kicked in, and I wasn't feeling too great. I wasn't nauseous this time around, but I was moody and tired 99% of the time. Everything felt overwhelming and exhausting - cooking dinner, playing with my children, blogging, getting dressed. I was pathetic, hence the reason for my writing hiatus.

I am due mid-August, so that makes me 30 weeks pregnant. This pregnancy has flown by at lightning quick speed, and I can hardly believe that I am so close to the end already. I am trying to savor the whole experience, because this will most likely be our last baby. Some days I sit on the couch for hours with my hands on my belly, feeling my little one kick and squirm around. Knowing that I might never experience it again is heartbreaking.

This time around we decided not to find out the sex of the baby. We have everything for a girl and everything for a boy, so we are well prepared in the clothes department. I didn't give away any of my baby stuff (exersaucer, swing, bouncy seat, etc), so we don't really have to invest any money in baby gear. The main thing I needed was a stroller (I sold my single stroller and bought a double stroller when Izzy was born). But my mother came to the rescue and bought me a Graco snap-n-go stroller. Really, I just need to buy some diapers and wipes, and we should be set!

I am, without a doubt, one of the luckiest people in the world. I feel so blessed to be able to have another baby. I can't wait to hold my sweet little babe in my arms. I can't wait to nurse my little one to sleep. I can't wait to experience the miracle of meeting this new little person that John and I created.

Birthday girl

She is five today. My baby girl is five.

Hello world

Remember me? I am that crazy woman who blogged constantly and then just fell off the face of the earth. I almost gave up blogging completely. My heart just wasn't in it anymore. Instead of being a calm and peaceful retreat, this online journal became an annoying and tedious chore. But try as I might, I just can't seem to say goodbye.

For months now, I have felt guilty about my lack of blogging. Honestly, I consider many of my readers friends. I know that some of you were worried about me and my family, so I just wanted to let everyone know that we are fine. Actually, we're better than fine. We're GREAT!

Lots has happened since we last talked. It is hard to put it all into words, so instead I'll let you take a sneak peek...