2011 isn't panning out the way I had hoped

You are never going to believe this, but my mother was admitted to the hospital on Saturday. The same hospital where my grandmother is currently residing. What is up with my family?

Apparently my mother has been sick for the past week. On top of that, she kept having sharp pains in her left ribcage. When the pain became too much, she went to the ER. After an EKG and some blood work, she was admitted to the hospital. I called and talked to her, but it was hard to get any solid facts out of her. She keep downplaying the entire episode, acting like the doctors were crazy. I think she just didn't want me to worry. But, of course, I am worried. My mom has had a hard life. She has never taken care of herself, and it is definitely showing as she ages. The thing that worries me the most is that her father died at age 50 from a heart attack. When you point this out to her, my mother acts like you are being ridiculous. This fact terrifies me. I wish it had the same effect on my mother (because then maybe she would take better care of herself).

Now I am feeling doubly guilty about not being in Kentucky. But I can't go. I just can't. We have several doctor appointments coming up, I don't have the money to travel right now, and on top of that, I am fucking sick again. Can you believe that shit? I started feeling better on Friday. I felt pretty good on Saturday. Sunday morning I was back to my old self again. But by Sunday evening I was miserable. I currently have a nasty sore throat, and my head feels like it weighs about 400 pounds. I am so over winter.

So, I am worried about my mom, I am worried about my grandma, and I am tired of being sick.

Getting back to life

I have just suffered through one of the worst colds I have had in years. I felt like crap for days and days and days. I had a sore throat, a runny nose, the worst throbbing heachache, and the leakiest eyes EVER. My whole body hurt, and I was overwhelming tired during the majority of the day. This resulted in lots of "resting" on the couch, while my children tortured me. I wish I could have convinced Porgie and Izzy of how horrible I felt, because they had no sympathy for me. It was a rough couple of days. The good news is that I feel slightly better today.

I was a complete slacker this week. John had to do the laundry. I canceled EVERY SINGLE outing we had planned. I avoided the phone. I didn't clean the living room or play room. I am usually the type of person who will trudge forward, regardless of how shitty I feel. But this time, I took some much needed time off from my regular duties. It also helped that we had another HUGE snow storm (we got 14.9 inches on Wednesday night). It was the perfect excuse to stay at home in my jammies.

This weekend we have a birthday party to attend, I am buying a bread machine from a lady on Craig's list (get ready for lots of bread related blogging!), and I am going to clean my nasty house. And we now return to our regularly scheduled programs.

Things

* Grandma has agreed to a three week stay in the hospital for rehabilitation. At first she was refusing physical therapy. Why are old people so stubborn and ridiculous?

* I have a cold. My throat hurts, and I have a runny nose.

* John and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary on Friday. We went out to dinner and ordered an appetizer and dessert! We haven't done that in FOREVER. It felt frivolous and wasteful to spend so much money on food, but it also felt really good to order whatever we wanted.

* I took the kids to the Please Touch Museum last week. SO MUCH FUN!

* Our washing machine was repaired today - to the tune of $200. So in case you are wondering, over the past week we have spent nearly $700 repairing broken crap around here. Our budget has been shot to hell.

* It is cold as a bitch in NJ. The high today is 19 degrees. Brrrrr!

* I skipped storytime this week. I just could not muster the strength to bundle up both kids on a frigid Monday morning to listen to a story. Instead, I baked some bread, folded some laundry, and cleaned the bathroom. It was surprisingly refreshing to just stay home.

* I baked some pumpkin cookies. They turned out very cake-like, but they were still yummy. I also made vanilla cupcakes with chocolate icing. And then John bought me some butter-creams for our anniversary. I can feel myself getting fatter right this very instant.

I want to kick someone in the head and scream at the top of my lungs

This week has been a NIGHTMARE. My grandma broke her hip, our internet router died, I had to have the brakes replaced on my van, and now my fucking washing machine is full of water and refuses to spin/drain/stop buzzing. What the fuck world? WHAT THE FUCK?

Granny update

My grandma's surgery went well. What a huge relief! I get unusually nervous about general anesthesia, and I am not really sure why. But anyways, everything looks great for my granny. The doctor thinks that she will be up on her legs (for short periods of time) by Thursday or Friday! I had no idea that she would be attempting to walk so soon after surgery. Needless to say, I am happy and relieved.

This has been a crazy week, and I have been feeling exceptionally drained. I actually fell asleep while the kids were napping on Tuesday afternoon. I haven't done that in YEARS. I thought I would be wide awake all night as a result, but surprisingly, I went right to sleep. I guess I have been stressing myself out, and my body just needed to recover. Anyways, I am feeling better today, which is good because I have million things to do.

On a completely unrelated topic, today marks 4 full years of blogging. I honestly can't believe I have been writing in this little space for so damn long! It is oddly therapeutic. Usually I devote a whole post to my anniversary, but this year I am just not feeling it. I am still writing, hope you're still reading, yadda yadda yadda.

Peace out homies!

Grandma

My grandma fell and broke her hip yesterday morning. She was walking out of the local bakery and just fell. There was no ice or snow, and she didn't trip over anything. She hit the concrete hard and was in a lot of pain. Despite her complete inability to get back up, she begged my aunt not to call an ambulance (because my grandmother has never willingly gone to the hospital in her life). Thankfully, my aunt called 911 anyways. At the ER they confirmed that she had broke her hip. She was admitted to the hospital and is now awaiting surgery. Oddly enough, they do not think that the fall broke her hip. Instead, they said that her hip most likely broke while she was walking, which caused her to fall.

This is pretty much the worst thing that could have happened to my granny. She is fiercely independent, so requiring help from others will be extremely hard for her. My mother is already talking about putting her in a convalescent home while she recovers, and I can't even bear the thought. My grandma will be completely and totally devastated in that environment.

I feel so helpless and so far away. There would not be much I could do even if I still lived in Kentucky. But I could be physically present, offering her a helping hand. And I am not. The whole situation makes me overwhelmingly sad.

Target Chronicles

Relationships are hard. John and I have been together as a couple for 13 years. We have been married for 6 years. Yet somehow, we still find ways to completely annoy each other.

John and I had a huge fight at Target on Sunday. You see, my husband is an asshole. Of course you're only getting my version of events, but trust me - he is an asshole. When I go shopping with the kids, I have rules. Rule # 1 is that the children must stay in the cart. This story starts out with a complete disregard for rule # 1, and therefore, the trip to Target was horrible. Thanks to my husband.

We walked in the door, grabbed one of those HUGE carts that can accommodate about 4 children, and then walked up the isle. Porgie's harness was broken, so John mindlessly told her she didn't have to ride in the cart. Before she hopped down, I told her that daddy was wrong and that she needed to stay in the cart. She told me, "NO!" (with lots of attitude) and got down. This blatant disregard for my opinion really pissed me off. When I tried to correct her behavior, John kept interrupting me, pointlessly explaining why Porgie could get out of the cart. By this point, it was no longer about breaking rule # 1 (although is does annoy me, because when John doesn't make them follow the rules, then our next trip to the store is HORRIBLE because no one wants to follow the rules!). I was now pissed about my daughter's attitude and my husband defense of her attitude.

After making asses out of ourselves (i.e. yelling at one another in the middle of the store), we angrily stormed off in different directions. I took Izzy, who was still strapped into the cart, and John took Porgie. We met up later in the shopping trip, and I am happy to report that Izzy was doing an excellent job. Porgie, on the other hand, was running around like a demented monkey. I felt justified for being a bitch about this whole issue. Kid in the cart = good. Kid running around = very, very bad.

Eventually, I had to put my daughter back in the cart to regain control of the situation, because my husband is a stubborn jerk who refuses to admit when he is wrong. The rest of the day was spent being angry with one another. Let me just say that Monday has never been so anticipated in all of my life.

Mood: Blah

Gosh, I suck at this whole blogging thing. I promised myself that I would blog M-F this week, yet somehow I completely missed Wednesday. Darn! I blame the weather. I have been in a mood lately. Not a mean, nasty mood or a depressed, melancholy mood - just a general feeling of BLAH. It is infecting every area of my life. Do you want to go to the Target? Blah. Do you want to talk to you mother on the phone? Blah. Do you want to play in the snow with your children? Blah. You get the idea. Nothing sounds fun or interesting or even remotely engaging.

To break up all this blahness, here are some random facts for little old you...

* My children won't nap anymore. Ever since our trip to Kentucky, they just party during nap time. I have mixed feelings about this.

* For the life of me, I cannot stay on top of the fucking laundry. It has gotten to the point where I am considering buying new clothes instead of washing the ones we currently own.

* I ate an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's the other night. THE WHOLE PINT! I thought it would make me happy, but instead I just felt horrible about lack of willpower.

* My husband had to work late on the one night he is responsible for cooking dinner. You have no idea how much this annoyed me. What are the odds? Why does the world always conspire against me?

Shitty morning

You know, you can never win a battle with children. They are evil little creatures, who know exactly how to make your life miserable. I think I mentioned a few weeks ago that I stopped buying nighttime diapers, only to find myself changing wet sheet EVERY SINGLE MORNING. Izzy just wasn't ready. So we switched to pull-ups at night and life has been fairly peaceful ever since.

This morning I went into Izzy's room to inform him that it was time to get up. Just so you fully understand, he wasn't asleep. He was just playing in his room because I had not given him permission to open his bedroom door yet. You read that correctly. My children are not allowed out of their rooms until I say so. The last thing I need is children running around my house at six o'clock in the morning.

When I opened his door, he said, "Me pooped."

I said, "WHAT?!?"

He said, "Me pooped."

I picked him up and put him on the changing table. Holy crap! He had taken the world's largest poop in his pull-up (which he has never done before. NEVER.) It was everywhere - in his diaper, up his back, and down his legs. It was, without a doubt, one of the grossest things I have ever experienced. He is way too big to be pooping in his pull-up.

Now I am left reconsidering my entire routine. Maybe the kids should be allowed out of their rooms in the mornings? All I know is that I don't want to start my morning with shit again. EVER.

Burrito Memories

When Izzy was a baby, he had lots of GI problems. As a result, I was on a severely restricted diet (because of breastfeeding). There was very little that I could eat, and the few things that I could eat were bland and boring. But then I discovered Amy's burritos. I fell in love. So tasty! So healthy! So easy! I ate them weekly for the next YEAR that I nursed Izzy.

After Izzy's tummy troubles subsided, I started eating normal food again. Amy's burritos were too expensive, and I stopped buying them. Yesterday I was at the grocery store, and I seen a black bean burrito. I couldn't resist. I plunked two of those bad boys in my cart. While we were paying for our groceries, Izzy started crying for a burrito. Although he had never eaten an Amy's burrito before, I decided that I would share my lunch with him.

When we got home, Izzy asked me to make the burritos. And then my son proceeded to eat an entire burritos by himself! He kept telling me how yummy it was, while licking his chubby little fingers. Could be possibly remember the taste from my breast milk? You have no idea how much he delighted in those burritos. It was bizarre and adorable, all at the same time.

The bird

So, it snowed again. Gah! I used to freaking love the snow, but now? Not so much. Snow means we have to stay home. Snow means that my kids want to go outside in the freezing weather every 20 minutes. Snow means too much clothing - boots, coats, gloves, scarves, hats, etc. I think it is official. I am no longer a winter person. I prefer the fall now. Isn't it strange how kids change your entire way of thinking - even your likes and dislikes? So, this weekend was boring. And this week is probably going to be boring too. Fucking stupid winter.

Now lets get to the real reason for this post...
Is it just me, or is Hello Kitty flipping me off?

FREE

The Please Touch Museum of Philadelphia is hosting another free blogger day. If you live in the area, it is a great (FREE) opportunity to go explore the museum.

Please Join Us for Bloggers Day at Please Touch Museum!

Friday, January 21, at 10 a.m.

Bring the kids and join us for Bloggers Day at Please Touch Museum! You’re invited to a sneak preview of our newest traveling exhibit, Access/ABILITY, a disability awareness exhibit developed by Boston Children’s Museum. We’ll also have information about our slate of 2011 programming, including our new Wellness Mamma program for new moms, the next season of You & Me Playdates, April’s Celebrate Stories month, and the return of the Junior Jazz Festival in May!

Please RSVP by Wednesday, January 19 to fluzi@pleasetouchmuseum.org or call 215-581-3171

Reward Chart

Kids are tough. Especially little boys named Izzy who happen to live in my house. My son is a willful child. And when he decides that he doesn't like something, well, you better watch out. He recently decided that bedtime was for losers. In a matter of weeks, he turned our fabulous night-time routine into a horrible nightmare. The kid has a knack for pushing my buttons (especially at bedtime).

Basically, Izzy started dragging out the entire bedtime routine. I would have to ask him 200 times to use the potty. He would fight me while I attempted to brush his teeth (I say attempted, because I am not sure the toothbrush ever touched his teeth). It would take him approximately 2 hours to put on his pajamas. When asked to climb into bed, he would scream and cry for "1 more minute!" This whole routine was beyond frustrating.

I decided to introduce a reward chart into the scenario, in the hopes that Izzy would stop his ridiculous behavior. The rules were simple. If the kids did everything (pee on the potty, brush their teeth, and get into their pajamas) the first time they were asked, then they would get a sticker. When they get 10 stickers, we will go out for ice cream.

The first nap-time was a dream. Both of the kids were sooooo good. I was impressed and super proud of myself for being such an awesome mom. But then bedtime rolled around. Holy crap. Izzy was awful. I had to ask him 5 times to pee on the potty, threatening to not give him a sticker the entire time (I don't know why I gave him so many chances. I guess I just wanted him to be successful.). Then he was being difficult while I was brushing his teeth. And finally, he refused to put on his pajamas. The sticker was gone. But the truly horrible part (for Izzy), was that Porgie got her sticker. Oh the torture! He apologized. He screamed. He threw his body on the floor, kicked his feet, and sobbed. He was so hysterical that John had to take him to his room for a time-out.

I am not entirely sure that Izzy understands the reward chart, but I know, without a doubt, that he regrets not getting that sticker. I have my fingers crossed that he will earn that sticker tonight:)

Christmas Cookies

Because I have assumed the role of Suzie Homemaker, I decided to bake all of my neighbors cookies this year. I baked everything one Saturday morning, and I delivered them that evening. Honestly, it felt good to do something nice and unexpected for other people. And almost everyone invited us inside, so it was fun chatting and getting up-to-date on all the neighborhood gossip:)

Below is the cookie line-up. Everything turned out GREAT. Seriously, almost every batch was perfect. I was super proud of my awesome baking skills...

Chocolate Thumbprint Cookies

Santa Whiskers

Chocolate Chip Cookies

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Cookies

Cherry Almond Cookies

Magical Coconut Bars

I divided the cookies up onto 9 plates...

Then I wrapped them in plastic wrap and tied them with a ribbon. Easy peezy...

Breaking Routine

I like routine. I like things to be the same. So big events, like traveling to Kentucky, can really throw me for a loop. Last week, even after we unpacked all of our stuff, I still felt completely off-kilter. John was on vacation, the house was a wreck, and my children seemed to be in the worst moods EVER. By Sunday evening, I couldn't wait for Monday morning to arrive.

Monday morning meant that life would finally return to a normal state of affairs. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my family and having lazy days at home with my husabnd. But I also love my routine. Although I would like to tell you that we are sticking close to home today, we are starting a new class at the local nature center. I was thinking of skipping this first class, but I know that the kids will love it, so we are going.

However, on Tuesday, we are totally getting back to our routine. AND I CAN'T WAIT!

Reviewing stuff

CSN has once again contacted me to review a product from their website. I was so happy with my cast iron bread pan, how could I refuse? In case you haven't heard, CSN is an online store where you can find lots of cool stuff. Whether you need a cute leather briefcase or a fabulous new diaper bag, CSN has it. I have been browsing their site, and I am leaning heavily toward purchasing a cast iron muffin tin. But I am the indecisive type, so you never know. Check back soon to see what I choose and how it measures up:)