Mmmmm...pie

Okay, so my children look nothing alike.  Every single person guessed correctly.  I think Guppy and Porgie both look like John.  Izzy resembles my side of the family.  None of my children actually look like me, although they all have my nose, which is kind of fun.  It is the one feature that unites all three of them - cute little pudgy noses!

Guppy and Izzy have a doctor appointment in the morning (4 month and 4 year check-up).  I am not looking forward it.  I am always convinced that my kids are going to get sick whenever we enter the doctor's office. That place is germ central.  Ugh.

I bought a new cookbook!  I am super excited about making new pies!  So, be expecting lots of fun pie pictures.  To get the party started, here is my first pie...

Pumpkin Pie Brownies

Name that baby!

#1

#2

#3

Tired, sick, stupid, etc.

I finally got my braces off.  I know I should be more excited, but I am not.  Everything was fine until I got my retainers on Monday.  OH MY GOD, retainers are horrible.  I cannot speak.  I literally sound like I am mentally retarded.  Why didn't anyone tell me that retainers are way worse than braces?  Ugh.
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My baby boy is sick. He has a fever, and his tummy is very upset. He vomited three times yesterday. It is incredibly sad to see his tired little eyes and to hear his desperate little cry. Poor baby boy.
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My husband has been working tons of overtime.  I am trying to be thankful for all the extra money we'll have this Christmas, but usually I am just mad that John is never here to help out with the kids.  I love my children to death, but sometimes I need a break.
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My cousin flew to New Jersey last weekend to visit.  It was fun getting to chat and catch-up, but houseguests are hardwork when you have a newborn.  I felt like I ran my baby ragged, yet my cousin still seemed bored with all of the down time spent in the house while the baby napped and whatnot.  But I am still glad she came to visit.  I really miss seeing her.
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My brain is officially useless.  I guess it is all the sleep deprivation catching up with me.  I can't remember ANYTHING.  I forgot to take the kids to see Santa at the library last Friday.  We have gone every year since Porgie was born.  I was heartbroken when I realized that we had missed the whole event. 
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I have been trying to send out Christmas cards for about a week now.  Since Guppy only naps in 30 minute increments, it is really hard to get anything done.  So, my Christmas cards should probably make it out by Valentine's day.

My son is such a boy

Izzy drew a picture for me...
It is kind of hard to see (he used Colorwonder markers on regular paper), but note the huge boobs. Lovely.

Home is the funnest place on earth

Remember when I told you about feeling guilty for never doing anything fun with the kids? Well Tuesday night the library was having story time from 6:30 - 7:30. Since we haven't been since mid-summer, I asked John to take the kids. It was a "fall" themed story hour and the kids were supposed to bring in 3-4 different leaves.

At about 4pm, I took the kids outside and collected leaves. When we got back inside, I noticed there was a message on the phone. I checked it, and of course it was my husband telling me that he had to work late and wouldn't be home to take the kids to the library. Because I wanted to have fun with the kids, I decided that I would take all three kids to story time, even though the baby can be SUPER fussy in the evenings.

Long story short, story time sucked ass. I left early with 2 of my 3 kids screaming and crying. I learned my lesson. It is more fun to just stay home.

Rambling

For the first time since I had Guppy, I weighed myself. To my amazement, I have lost 20 pounds. Too bad that I gained too much and still have 23 more pounds to lose. BOO! I originally was shooting for a 30 pound weight gain. But I just couldn't seem to control my weight gain at various times in my pregnancy. Some months I would gain 2 pounds and others I would gain 12 pounds. I felt like I had very little control over it. So, this week I am going to try to start eating healthy again. Actually, I already eat fairly healthy, I really just need to watch my portion size. And stop eating Ben & Jerry's.

Guppy is doing great, but he is killing me with sleep deprivation. I had high hopes for this baby. I was sure that he was going to be my good sleeping baby. He was so calm and peaceful in the hospital. But he has been so freaking wakeful at night. He sleeps great during the day, but nighttime is a nightmare! He does this weird grunting, straining, and crying routine every hour or so all night long. And he is constantly rooting around and trying to nurse all freaking night. I am about to kick him out of my bed. I want to be a co-sleeping mama, but I can't handle this up all night nursing shit. I think I'll give him another week to get more settled at night, and if he is still nursing all damn night, we are going to make some changes in our sleep routine. I wouldn't mind getting up every two or three hours, but I am barely able to function on our current schedule.

John returned to work today. I have mixed emotions about this. I am excited to get back to our normal routine. I have felt a little off lately, and being more independent might help me feel normal again. But damn, I am going to miss having someone home to cook all my meals and change all the shitty diapers.

Bunk beds are hard

The bunk beds continue to wreak havoc on bedtime, but things are getting better. My children will not go straight to sleep, despite their level of exhaustion. They have to laugh and yell and play for at least 30 minutes. I have come to accept this as part of the bunk bed arrangement.

For the past several weeks, I would let them play for about 30 minutes and then I would go in and try to convince them to go to sleep. Of course, this rarely worked. Most nights, I would have to go back in (usually around 10pm by this time) and yell at them. Then, finally, they would settle down and go to sleep.

This week has been different though. I changed my tactics. I have been ignoring them completely, regardless of whether they have been playing for 45 minutes or 2 hours. And surprisingly, they seem to be falling asleep sooner (sometimes). The first few nights they fell asleep around 10pm. Then Porgie started falling asleep around 9:30 and Izzy reluctantly went to sleep around 10pm. But then on Wednesday night, they were both sound asleep by 9pm! I thought we had passed some sort of bunk bed milestone, and I went to bed happy on Wednesday night. Of course, they were completely out-of-control on Thursday night and didn't go to sleep until well after 10pm. Ugh.

Fingers crossed that we can get this problem fixed before the new baby arrives. I don't expect them to be perfect, but if they could just tone it down and go to sleep before I do, that would be great.

Baby!

I went to visit my friend C and her new baby. OH MY GOD, newborn babies are so small! He was just the tiniest, cutest little thing in the whole world. His skin was so soft! And his feet were so teeny! I just wanted to eat him up. I held him for almost an entire hour, and honestly, I could have cuddled him for much longer. Then I came home to my HUGE children. I swear Porgie grew 3 inches while I was visiting with the new little one. My daughter has been really into babies lately, so she was a little disappointed that she didn't get to visit the baby too. I hope this love of babies continues after our baby arrives in August, because I could use the help!

I wanted to bake something delicious for C and her husband. You see, I often have really good intentions, but my plans rarely ever work out. I wanted to make this yummy strawberry pie that I have been making every week since we went strawberry picking nearly a month ago. I currently have a half eaten strawberry pie in my fridge, but I thought I had another pie pan stored away somewhere. I searched high and low, but the pie pan was nowhere to be found. Since the pie was out, I found a recipe for strawberry shortcake cookies. I procrastinated and ended up making them right before Porgie's dance class, and we were nearly late for class as a result. To top everything off, the cookies came out flat and mushy. I seem to be completely unable to make cookies lately. Every recipe (even my tried and true recipes), turn out too hard or too soft or too flat. UGH. So, the new mother did not receive a delicious treat from me. However I did crochet her baby a beautiful afghan, so I think she'll forgive me.

Is it okay to wear a nightgown in public?

I was at Babies R Us this morning looking for some new nursing bras. While browsing around, I found this really cute dress...Except the the dress I bought is even cuter, because it is in a coral color. After I got home, I realized that the tag said it was a nightgown. But it doesn't look like a nightgown to me. I honestly and sincerely thought it looked like a maternity dress. So what do you think? If I wear it around town, will people constantly be thinking, Why is that woman wearing a nightgown to the grocery store?

Random things

My son keeps shitting in his underwear. I have no idea why he is has suddenly decided to be an ass. Actually, I do have a theory as to why he is pooping his pants. If my hunch is correct, he wants to wipe his own butt. After the THIRD pooping incident, I explained that he could wipe his own butt ONLY IF he pooped on the potty. Sometimes I think my son's sole mission in life is to drive me INSANE.
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It was sunny and beautiful last week. All of the snow melted, we played outside, and I started thinking about what I want to plant in our garden this year. And then mother nature bitch slapped me with snow. That is right, it is fucking snowing right now. I want to cry.
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My daughter is currently obsessed with the PBS show Super Why! She just can't seem to get enough. She calls herself Princess Pea, and she calls her brother Whyatt. She begs me to turn the show on every afternoon. Then she begs me to let her watch it on Netflix. It is a sickness.
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I have been eating way too much junk lately. Ugh. It started with my birthday. John got me one of those HUGE cookie cakes. Then I got a pound of butter creams for Valentine's day. Then I made those delicious lemon bars I posted about last week (in my defense, we had a bunch of lemons that were getting ready to go bad). And last Friday a good friend of mine baked me peanut butter brownies (a belated birthday gift). I have be eating all of this junk on a daily basis, and I can't stop. I have no will power when it comes to sweets.
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To balance my gorging on sugar, I bought the ingredients to make salad this week. Surprisingly I am looking forward to munching on veggies. Lets see how long that attitude lasts.

Vegan Lemon Bars and whatnot

These lemon bars are sooooo delicious. They are time consuming and a pain in the ass to make, but they taste like little pieces of heaven right here on Earth.
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The weather has been amazing lately. The temperature has been slowly creeping up the thermometer, melting all this nasty snow. AND it is supposed to be 65 degrees on Friday. You have no idea how excited I am . We are going to play outside ALL day.
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I think I may have talked my husband into doing a little renovation project in the kitchen. Last night while bitching about doing the dishes, I proposed that we replace our counter top, purchase a smaller sink, and add a dishwasher. With the way our kitchen is currently arranged, the large double sink hinders our ability to add a dishwasher. The amazing part is that John actually wants to go to Lowes to price the supplies.
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I watched the documentary Waiting for "Superman" last night. It was a depressing film on the state of education in America. I actually grew up in a crappy neighborhood, with "failing" schools (according to the state test scores). And despite what many people on the film stated, I didn't feel cheated or robbed of my education. I graduated from a school in the ghetto, and I feel like I received a great education. I am just as smart as you. But I can also see how the system has failed others. Both of my brothers went to the same schools that I attended and both dropped out. My brothers are currently unemployed and living with my mother. Obviously something went wrong. Or maybe we place too much emphasis on the schools and not enough emphasis on the parents. I definitely think my mother's behavior directly impacted my brothers' education.
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I got Izzy's hair cut yesterday. He always looks so handsome right after a haircut. The best part was that I had a coupon for $4.99. Is that a cheap haircut or what?

Things in my world

I had my teeth cleaned yesterday. I thought I was doing a really good job caring for my teeth, but apparently I am lacking in my brushing skills. It felt like the hygienist lady was tearing my gums apart. AWFUL. The worst part is that I had my last Ortho appintment on Tuesday, so my teeth were super sore and sensitive. It was just an all around bad experience. Note to self: Do not schedule two dental appointments in the same week.
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I have been working on a blanket for one of my pregnant friends for about 3-4 months. For some reason, this project is taking me FOREVER to complete. Even John has commented on how he never wants to look at the blanket again. I couldn't agree more. After I finish this project, I am hanging up my crocheting needles for a while. Several people I know are currently pregnant, so technically I should be crocheting more than ever. But I think I am going to take the easy route and just buy them something from the store.
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My daughter is going through a super annoying phase right now. For some reason, she keeps getting up between 5am and 6 am. WHY? No one knows. I think John is waking her up while he getting ready for work. And instead of going back to sleep (like she has done for the past 4 years), she is just starting the day really really really early. It wouldn't be so bad if she just played quietly in her room. But noooooo - she has to be an ass. She keeps opening and closing her bedroom door repeatedly. She doesn't actually go out of her room. She just opens the fucking door 200 times per minute. Yesterday I lost my cool and ended up yelling at her at 5:45am. Not fun. I am thinking about buying her a digital clock, and telling her that if the first number is a 4, 5 or 6 she has to stay in bed. She can only get up if the number is a 7 or 8. It probably won't work, but I've got to try something.
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John and I have been talking more and more about refinishing our basement. We don't really have the money right now, but after we pay off our home equity loan I think we'll be able to swing it. Honestly, I don't really care about the extra space. I really just want a second bathroom. We have one bathroom. ONE! I can't take it anymore. I need another bathroom.
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We finally got rid of cable. It is strange, because we never watched TV when we had cable. But ever since it was turned off, I have become obsessed with Television. Now I find myself watching cooking shows on PBS and reruns of All in the Family. Why do we always want what we can't have?

Lately

Lately, I have been eating too much. Ice cream anyone?

Lately, I never feel like cleaning or cooking or tending to my children. The laundry is overwhelming.

Lately, I have been having trouble falling asleep at night. Bedtime is just an excuse to stare at the ceiling for 2 hours.

Lately, I have been avoiding my friends. There is no real reason for this. I just don't want to talk to anyone.

I can't wait until this month, this weather, this feeling passes. I am longing for change. Especially change in the form of sunshine and grass. That damn groundhog better have good news tomorrow.

Things

* Grandma has agreed to a three week stay in the hospital for rehabilitation. At first she was refusing physical therapy. Why are old people so stubborn and ridiculous?

* I have a cold. My throat hurts, and I have a runny nose.

* John and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary on Friday. We went out to dinner and ordered an appetizer and dessert! We haven't done that in FOREVER. It felt frivolous and wasteful to spend so much money on food, but it also felt really good to order whatever we wanted.

* I took the kids to the Please Touch Museum last week. SO MUCH FUN!

* Our washing machine was repaired today - to the tune of $200. So in case you are wondering, over the past week we have spent nearly $700 repairing broken crap around here. Our budget has been shot to hell.

* It is cold as a bitch in NJ. The high today is 19 degrees. Brrrrr!

* I skipped storytime this week. I just could not muster the strength to bundle up both kids on a frigid Monday morning to listen to a story. Instead, I baked some bread, folded some laundry, and cleaned the bathroom. It was surprisingly refreshing to just stay home.

* I baked some pumpkin cookies. They turned out very cake-like, but they were still yummy. I also made vanilla cupcakes with chocolate icing. And then John bought me some butter-creams for our anniversary. I can feel myself getting fatter right this very instant.

Granny update

My grandma's surgery went well. What a huge relief! I get unusually nervous about general anesthesia, and I am not really sure why. But anyways, everything looks great for my granny. The doctor thinks that she will be up on her legs (for short periods of time) by Thursday or Friday! I had no idea that she would be attempting to walk so soon after surgery. Needless to say, I am happy and relieved.

This has been a crazy week, and I have been feeling exceptionally drained. I actually fell asleep while the kids were napping on Tuesday afternoon. I haven't done that in YEARS. I thought I would be wide awake all night as a result, but surprisingly, I went right to sleep. I guess I have been stressing myself out, and my body just needed to recover. Anyways, I am feeling better today, which is good because I have million things to do.

On a completely unrelated topic, today marks 4 full years of blogging. I honestly can't believe I have been writing in this little space for so damn long! It is oddly therapeutic. Usually I devote a whole post to my anniversary, but this year I am just not feeling it. I am still writing, hope you're still reading, yadda yadda yadda.

Peace out homies!

Mood: Blah

Gosh, I suck at this whole blogging thing. I promised myself that I would blog M-F this week, yet somehow I completely missed Wednesday. Darn! I blame the weather. I have been in a mood lately. Not a mean, nasty mood or a depressed, melancholy mood - just a general feeling of BLAH. It is infecting every area of my life. Do you want to go to the Target? Blah. Do you want to talk to you mother on the phone? Blah. Do you want to play in the snow with your children? Blah. You get the idea. Nothing sounds fun or interesting or even remotely engaging.

To break up all this blahness, here are some random facts for little old you...

* My children won't nap anymore. Ever since our trip to Kentucky, they just party during nap time. I have mixed feelings about this.

* For the life of me, I cannot stay on top of the fucking laundry. It has gotten to the point where I am considering buying new clothes instead of washing the ones we currently own.

* I ate an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's the other night. THE WHOLE PINT! I thought it would make me happy, but instead I just felt horrible about lack of willpower.

* My husband had to work late on the one night he is responsible for cooking dinner. You have no idea how much this annoyed me. What are the odds? Why does the world always conspire against me?

Shitty morning

You know, you can never win a battle with children. They are evil little creatures, who know exactly how to make your life miserable. I think I mentioned a few weeks ago that I stopped buying nighttime diapers, only to find myself changing wet sheet EVERY SINGLE MORNING. Izzy just wasn't ready. So we switched to pull-ups at night and life has been fairly peaceful ever since.

This morning I went into Izzy's room to inform him that it was time to get up. Just so you fully understand, he wasn't asleep. He was just playing in his room because I had not given him permission to open his bedroom door yet. You read that correctly. My children are not allowed out of their rooms until I say so. The last thing I need is children running around my house at six o'clock in the morning.

When I opened his door, he said, "Me pooped."

I said, "WHAT?!?"

He said, "Me pooped."

I picked him up and put him on the changing table. Holy crap! He had taken the world's largest poop in his pull-up (which he has never done before. NEVER.) It was everywhere - in his diaper, up his back, and down his legs. It was, without a doubt, one of the grossest things I have ever experienced. He is way too big to be pooping in his pull-up.

Now I am left reconsidering my entire routine. Maybe the kids should be allowed out of their rooms in the mornings? All I know is that I don't want to start my morning with shit again. EVER.

Burrito Memories

When Izzy was a baby, he had lots of GI problems. As a result, I was on a severely restricted diet (because of breastfeeding). There was very little that I could eat, and the few things that I could eat were bland and boring. But then I discovered Amy's burritos. I fell in love. So tasty! So healthy! So easy! I ate them weekly for the next YEAR that I nursed Izzy.

After Izzy's tummy troubles subsided, I started eating normal food again. Amy's burritos were too expensive, and I stopped buying them. Yesterday I was at the grocery store, and I seen a black bean burrito. I couldn't resist. I plunked two of those bad boys in my cart. While we were paying for our groceries, Izzy started crying for a burrito. Although he had never eaten an Amy's burrito before, I decided that I would share my lunch with him.

When we got home, Izzy asked me to make the burritos. And then my son proceeded to eat an entire burritos by himself! He kept telling me how yummy it was, while licking his chubby little fingers. Could be possibly remember the taste from my breast milk? You have no idea how much he delighted in those burritos. It was bizarre and adorable, all at the same time.

The bird

So, it snowed again. Gah! I used to freaking love the snow, but now? Not so much. Snow means we have to stay home. Snow means that my kids want to go outside in the freezing weather every 20 minutes. Snow means too much clothing - boots, coats, gloves, scarves, hats, etc. I think it is official. I am no longer a winter person. I prefer the fall now. Isn't it strange how kids change your entire way of thinking - even your likes and dislikes? So, this weekend was boring. And this week is probably going to be boring too. Fucking stupid winter.

Now lets get to the real reason for this post...
Is it just me, or is Hello Kitty flipping me off?

Breaking Routine

I like routine. I like things to be the same. So big events, like traveling to Kentucky, can really throw me for a loop. Last week, even after we unpacked all of our stuff, I still felt completely off-kilter. John was on vacation, the house was a wreck, and my children seemed to be in the worst moods EVER. By Sunday evening, I couldn't wait for Monday morning to arrive.

Monday morning meant that life would finally return to a normal state of affairs. Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my family and having lazy days at home with my husabnd. But I also love my routine. Although I would like to tell you that we are sticking close to home today, we are starting a new class at the local nature center. I was thinking of skipping this first class, but I know that the kids will love it, so we are going.

However, on Tuesday, we are totally getting back to our routine. AND I CAN'T WAIT!